Back to school

So we are only into day 3 of ‘back to school’ and I’ve been a ‘shit mum’ repeatedly since Monday. This weeks epic fuck ups have included: Leaving 2 coats worth £60 on the pavement because I was too busy trying to convince a 2 year old it’s ok to piss in a bush before […]

My darling Edie

My darling Edie, Hopefully by the time you’re old enough to read this post you’ll be old enough to understand why you have just cried yourself to sleep in this picture. Your blotchy red arms, tear stricken face and the way you make little sobbing noises in your sleep is as horrid for me to […]

Swimming lessons…

For anyone that’s had enough sense not to let their kid start swimming lessons I’m going to fill you in on why this is probably one of the best ideas you’ve ever had….(massive rant coming up 😤😤😉) So tonight was swimming night. This is my most hated club of the week (and there’s a lot […]

Tomorrow I’m going to…

Tomorrow I’m going to behave exactly like my children….i’m going to take it in turns to be each one of them (age ranges between 2-11) just to keep an element of surprise throughout the day. I’m going start by waking up at ridiculous o clock and launch myself through their bedroom door like a hand […]

Dear elderly lady…

Dear elderly lady in the supermarket, I’m here because I need something for tea, not because I want to be. I’m sorry that my child is annoying you but she has been at nursery all day so that I could work to afford to pay for this trolley of shopping. She is overtired and wants […]